River Dance

I feel it is my duty to keep some level of physical fitness given my chosen professions. However, working odd hours, eating fast/gas station food, and sitting on your 4th point of contact all night does not help out. That said, alot of cops are fat. Some are way fucking fat. Enter my 'No shit there I was' story.

18 yr old young indian buck decides to rape a 15ish girl. I am at the ER when she comes in, always sucks with crim-sex cases, she is very upset. She does her part though and gives a good statement to my partner. Our part now; find shit-bag and send him away to Pound-Me-In-The-Ass-Prison. For 10 days this cho-mo (jail slag for child molester) ou t runs my fellow Deputies. Now I get my turn. The plan is for me to flank the house he is hiding in so when he runs I can catch him.

We arrive at the house and I run left around the house. Couple people in the back yard, no cho-mo, and a pit bull. Next thing I know this dog is charging with a 'going to eat this brown dood in uniform look' on his nasty fang filled face. The pit starts in on my right leg, getting mostly boot in the face. To many people to pull the gun (used to cary a Ruger .45) so I try mace. I keep thrashing and going in circles, kicking like an Irish school girl at the River Dance festival, macing a pissed off mut. Not exactly in the law enforcement hand book. Next thing I see is fat little partner chasing cho-mo into the swamp 20 yards to my right. Fuck.